I Hate Being A Girl
by somerdaye
Summary: Short stories on how the girls of Hogwarts became women. The worst part of being female? Your first ever period. And this is how these girls got it.
1. hermione

**a/n; i'm taking a break from my 'Knocked Up' and 'Alphabet Family' fics.**

**i took stories from my girl friends for this, and the first one is MY story :S**

**enjoy! :D**

_**one; hermione**_

I was walking through Hogsmeade with Ron on Halloween; it was extremely awkward.

He looked at me in a strange way, and then appeared to check out my rear end.

I almost slapped him, but his confused look and words made me freeze.

"Hermione, your arse is...bleeding?"

I was _mortified_.

I nodded and I think I murmured a quick _thanks_ before dashing off to the nearest bathroom.

Of all the...

I _hate_ being a girl.

**a/n; teehee, next is...GINNY :O**


	2. ginny

**a/n; heehee, i'm glad a couple people liked the last chapter. :)**

**heeeeerrrreee'ssss GINNY! xD**

_**two; ginny**_

I didn't even notice.

I was eating dinner with all six of my brothers - my parents were out. Buying food, I think.

I finished first, since I ate the least, and went to get up from the table.

As I turned to go up the stairs, I heard hysterical laughing from behind me.

I whipped around to look at my brothers.

Bill looked sympathetic, but was grinning.

Charlie was chuckling heartily, trying to stop.

Percy was avoiding looking at me completely.

Fred and George were howling with mirth.

And Ron had slumped over the table with laughter.

"What?" I snapped at them all. God, they could be annoying.

Bill was the one to say, "Er, Gin? I think it's now extremely obvious that you are the only female Weasley."

That sure confused me.

"What're you - ?"

And then it hit me.

I turned as scarlet as the sun, and bolted upstairs, locking myself in the bathroom.

Why couldn't I have been a guy?

**a/n; aww, poor Ginny :( having all her brothers laughing at her like that...one of my friends went through that (only she has 3 brothers). ouch.**


	3. angelina

**a/n; sorry about this chapter. i know a lot of people were hoping i'd do Luna next, but i just couldn't pass this opportunity up. **

**i laughed for five straight minutes when this idea came to me. i hope you girls like it too :D**

**and yes, Angelina is VERY bold. and outspoken. or whatever the word is. ENJOY!**

_**three; angelina**_

People sometimes wonder why Severus Snape is so bitter.

Angelina _knows_ why.

She was in Potions, just minding her own business, when Snape asked her to stay after class.

"But, Professor, I didn't do anything!"

"No arguments, Miss Johnson, or points will be taken."

After everyone else left, casting her sympathetic looks, she marched up to the teacher's desk.

"Yes, Professor?"

Snape rolled his eyes.

"Well, Miss Johnson, I couldn't really let you walk around in a uniform covered in blood."

"_Blood!?_"

"Dueling, I suppose? Tsk, tsk, that'll be twenty points from Gryffindor, Miss Johnson."

Angelina was quite confused, before she felt a certain wetness.

"_SHITE_!"

Snape was livid.

"Miss Johnson, that is inappropiate language! Another ten points!"

"You idiot, I just got my period!"

She could've sworn his face went as white as paper.

"O-oh." He stuttered.

Muttering a quick '_gotta go_', she ran to the nearest bathroom.

And Severus Snape was never the same.

**a/n; well...it sounded a lot funnier in my head. oh well.**

**i promise that Luna is next :D**


	4. luna

**a/n; okay, i am a REALLY bad updater. forgive me? ;D**

**here's the one you've all been waiting for...LUNNAAA!!**

_**four; luna**_

She was having the time of her life, commentating the Quidditch game.

Drawing attention away from the actual game, she thought it would make it easier for the players.

Suddenly, Harry was knocked out. She screamed and stood up.

Before she could say anything, McGonagall handed the magical megaphone over to a random kid, and dragged Luna away.

"Miss Lovegood, I feel I should tell you...your monthly..._friend_ has just arrived." She said in an uncomfortable tone of voice.

Luna stared at her, uncomprehensive.

"I don't have a monthly friend, Professor."

McGonagall looked even more mortified.

"Miss Lovegood, you don't know what a...period is?"

Luna frowned and shook her head. "Nope. Daddy's never mentioned it to me. What is it?"

Feeling extremely foolish, McGonagall explained everything to Luna, wondering why on earth her father hadn't.

Once the explanation was over, Luna looked shocked.

"Oh."

After a pause, she looked thoughtful.

"How come we're still alive if we bleed for a week every month?"

The teacher in front of her sighed in exasperation, before slowly telling Luna that she did not actually _bleed_.

"So..." The blonde frowned, as though trying to understand something. "So...I could get pregnant now?"

McGonagall nodded, relieved that she had finally cottoned on.

"Well, then, let's hope no Jinguni Fertilizers get to me!" Luna smiled serenely, and then skipped off.

McGonagall just stared at the spot she had disappeared from.

**a/n; ahaha...sorry, i just thought that Luna would totally make up a random animal (or, sorry, a 'real' animal that her father told her about) xD**

**anyway, i hope that lived up to your expectations! :D**

**who next?**


	5. lavender

**a/n;** I'm back.

_**five; lavender**_

She still gets mortified whenever it's brought up.

Rewind to the Sorting of 1991, and you'll understand why.

Lavender was worried enough as it was. Shaking in her brand new Mary Janes.

"Brown, Lavender!" Was called, and she staggered up to the rickety stool.

The hat was placed over her head, and the Hall disappeared, thanks to the black material now in front of her eyes.

_Brown, is it? We've had Browns before...if I recall correctly, they were Gryffindors..._

_Yes, sir, Mr Hat, sir._ Lavender silently pleaded. _And it would mean so much to me if I was the same. Please, sir?_

_Hmm...well, you _do_ already have the colors. GRYFFINDOR!_

After the Sorting was over with, Lavender pondered his words.

Gold? Her hair, yes, certainly.

But scarlet? Her eyes were blue, her headband purple - where the hell was _scarlet_ coming from?

Her question was answered when she stood up, and the Weasley twins cracked up laughing. She turned her head to look at the back of her robes, and nearly died of mortification.

_Ho shit._

**a/n; **Um. Yeah. I don't have much to say. This one was short. Sorry.


	6. minerva

**a/n;** Yeah. Sorry.

_**six; minerva**_

She'd just finished her third-year Transfiguration exam, and feeling pretty good about it, too.

That was until she crashed into a tall - holy crap, _very_ tall - figure, and was almost knocked to the ground. The boy did nothing to steady her, he just stared.

She realised the boy she was glaring at was none other than Tom Riddle, the most antisocial Slytherin she'd ever heard of.

Flipping her hair over her shoulder and attempting to gather her dignity, Minerva stalked away.

She heard someone sniggering behind her, and whipped around. Riddle was the only other person in the corridor, and he wasn't really one to laugh in front of Gryffindors.

But the mirth was most definitely coming from him, because he was holding a hand to his mouth, trying to control himself.

"What?" Minerva snapped, getting annoyed. Riddle just shook his head and walked away, still chuckling.

She stood in the corridor for a minute, confused, before her best friend Poppy Pomfrey came hurtling around the corner.

"There you _are_!" she exclaimed, hugging Minerva and looking at her in a concerned way. "Are you okay? You look pale."

Minerva rolled her eyes at her friend's anxiousness before turning around and crossing her arms. "Fine. Riddle was laughing at me for some reason, and I can't figure out why."

"Oh, _dear_. Minnie, your menstruation is showing."

Minerva looked at the ceiling. Of all the days.

**a/n;** Yep. A few of you wanted McGonagall. And Madame Pomfrey uses the technical term for everything. xD


End file.
